A Pam Ayres Lockdown poem - Motorhome Forums, Motorhome Discussion, Motorhome Chat

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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 02-11-2020, 12:40 Thread Starter
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A Pam Ayres Lockdown poem

I'm normally a social girl
I love to meet my mates
But lately with the virus here
We can't go out the gates
You see, we are the 'oldies' now
We need to stay inside
If they haven't seen us for a while
They'll think we've upped and died
They'll never know the things we did
Before we got this old
There wasn't any Facebook
So not everything was told
We may seem sweet old ladies
Who would never be uncouth
But we grew up in the 60s -
If you only knew the truth!
There was sex and drugs and rock 'n roll
The pill and miniskirts
We smoked, we drank, we partied
And were quite outrageous flirts
Then we settled down, got married
And turned into someone's mum,
Somebody's wife, then nana,
Who on earth did we become?
We didn't mind the change of pace
Because our lives were full
But to bury us before we're dead
Is like a red rag to a bull!
So here you find me stuck inside
For four weeks, maybe more
I finally found myself again
Then I had to close the door!
It didnít really bother me
I'd while away the hour
I'd bake for all the family
But I've got no flaming flour!
Now Netflix is just wonderful
I like a gutsy thriller
I'm swooning over Idris
Or some random sexy killer
At least I've got a stash of booze
For when I'm being idle
There's wine and whiskey, even gin
If I'm feeling suicidal!
So let's all drink to lockdown
To recovery and health
And hope this awful virus
Doesn't decimate our wealth
We'll all get through the crisis
And be back to join our mates
Just hoping I'm not far too wide
To fit through the flaming gates!

I'm Jan
We learn something new every day.
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 02-11-2020, 13:00
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Love it, she has always been a favourite, actually saw her at Exeter Uni for an evening presentation, the laughter made my sides ache....
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Any typo that I make means the errorists win.

Any comments above are only MY OPINION and should be read as that.

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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 02-11-2020, 13:17
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super! And read it with an Oxfordshire accent it'll sound great....
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As far as I know, the only motorhoming Oxford United supporter in Felpham.

I don't feed trolls!
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 02-11-2020, 13:31 Thread Starter
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I was once told I sounded like her, I was reading one of her poems out loud mind.
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I'm Jan
We learn something new every day.
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 02-11-2020, 15:25 Thread Starter
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Came across this one

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I'm Jan
We learn something new every day.
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