You may have noticed I've been a little absent of late.
We are now approved foster carers. Something we both wanted to do for very different reasons.
So, little one is now nearly 17 and she has a serious boyfriend. Yeah, it's hard trying to get my head around this! Oh God, I don't like this. I really really don't like this!!
But who am I to be worried?
I started going out with my girlfriend when I was 16 and we were together for 28 years until she sadly passed away. We had a wonderful life together and it was a truly wonderful loving relationship. Little one knows all about my past. I can hardly tell her not to get 'too involved' can I? He's a nice boy. We know his family. I hope it goes okay for both of them. Oh God, I hate this!
She's a good girl and we both love her very much. She knows this. We want her to be safe and at some stage she has to become an adult I suppose....Oh God, why now! I don't like this! Why can't they stay children forever??
And now we have 'special child'...
We got a call from a social worker sat in McDonalds with a 13 year old. She has nowhere to go. It's only for 5 days. We know you were approved for 1-9 year old's but we really think you guys will get along.....
A horrible teenager!! Smashing up the local shops! getting into fights and taking drugs! setting fire to the house and running away!
Me I don't think we should do this.
Her It's only for 5 days. We can do 5 days. She needs somewhere and we have a bed for her
Me Well, if it's only for 5 days I suppose we can do 5 days
Several months later.....and could possibly be longer
Oooh, she's a little minx!
She's a bit cheeky sometimes. She's funny. She's clever. She's street smart. She struggles taking compliments. She's a little bit rough round the edges (as am I!!) and we care for her deeply. We're not allowed to say we love her dearly and would miss her terribly. This is a job and we shouldn't get attached. We are not 'foster parents' we are 'foster carers'.
She looks to our little one constantly. If our little one doesn't like something, then special child doesn't like it.
Special child came from an environment where she was expected to be a carer for others. In our house, she is the youngest child and we allow her to be a child. She is the baby of the family and we treat her as such and she thrives on it.
Problem now, little one doesn't like the motorhome and has voiced this. But she has another life now with her boyfriend and that's OK.
Special child has to come with us wherever and whatever we do. She's picking up the negative vibes about motorhoming (toilet situation!) and she's following little one's lead - if she doesn't like then I don't like it.
She follows our daughter like a little duck. Our daughter is OK with this. It's a good thing for both of them. Special child follows by example and our daughter leads incredibly well. We would have struggled without little one's guidance.
Now we need to separate them to give our little one time with her relationship and special child is going to miss her.
Already trying to tell little one to be more positive about motorhoming for special child's benefit.
Reworking cycle rack to carry more bikes (a video will follow!)
Trying to gently introduce her to motorhoming, but it's not easy as our little one hates it so much and has voiced all her negatives!
Got to get more ideas and fun things to do with our special child now!